Saturday, November 7, 2009

:: Universal Jokes ::

:: Universal Jokes ::

Free Ride

A farmer took the camper off his truck before going to town.

As he was going down the road five Blondes were standing beside the road hitchhiking.

The farmer picked them up, one blonde got in the front and the other four blondes got in the back.

As they were going over the hill the brakes went out on the truck.

The farmer couldn't stop the truck and they went into the pond at the bottom.

The farmer and the blonde that were up front come up out of the water a minute later.

They kept waiting for others in the back to come up.

The farmer said, "I wonder where they are?"

The blonde said, "May be they drowned."

About five minutes later they come up gasping for breath. The farmer asked, "What the Hell took you so long?"

The four blondes said, "We had a devil of a time getting that fucking tailgate open!".....




Wrong Question!

Joe and David are walking from religious service. Joe wonders whether it would be all right to smoke while praying.

David replies, "Why don't you ask the Priest?"

So Joe goes up to the Priest and asks, "Father, may I smoke while I pray?"

The Priest replies, "No, my son, you may not! That's utter disrespect to our religion."

Joe goes back to his friend and tells him what the good Priest told him.

David says, "I'm not surprised. You asked the wrong question. Let me try."

And so David goes up to the Priest and asks, "Father, may I pray while I smoke?"

To which the Priest eagerly replies, "By all means, my son. By all means. You can always pray whenever you want to.".....




:: Universal Visuals ::

CTRL+C and CTRL+V

That's God's version of doing Copy, Paste.




Do You Use Credit Cards?

See why your neighbourhood beggar is worried about spending habits.

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